Alice's Closet
by Cordaela
Summary: When Edward and Bella escape into Alice's closet to try and get some alone time, they're suprised to see that they aren't the only ones taking refuge amidst all the clothes! oneshot.


**A/N-- EVERYONE is a vampire in this one...**

Disclaimer- I don't own the characters. Wish I did, though.

_**BPOV**_

Edward led me by the hand through the Cullen's mansion. Up the stairs, down the long hallway, second door on the left...

Alice's room? Why the heck is Edward leading me to the demonic pixie's room? I stood still- with my strength, he couldn't move me if he tried. He turned to me- "Bella- come on. If we don't hurry, Alice will see us."

I followed him with a sigh, wondering where we could go where Alice wouldn't see us.

Then I understood.

"Won't she see us?"

"She won't be looking here."

In front of me, the doors of a certain person's closet loomed tall and fearsome. Embossed in gold letters on the front, the name "Alice's Closet" struck fear into my very core.

"Edward, you've got to be kidding me! No frickin' WAY am I going in there!!!" But as soon as the words were out of my mouth, Edward whisked me inside, flicking on a light switch to the right of the doorway. "Think about it-" he said. "Alice knows you absolutely loathe coming anywhere NEAR her closet. So if she's looking for you to play Bella Barbie, this is the one place she won't be looking!"

I thought over his words and decided that they did make a lot of sense...but there was one thing nagging me still.

"Why?"

Then he smiled that grin of his, and I didn't really care why anymore.

"Why do you think, Isabella?" he said silkily, my name rolling off his tongue, his nose skimming from my ear to my collarbone. I looked up into his eyes and mischief was there, playing in the murky golden depths. He closed the door behind us, and the latch clicked shut. We hurried farther into the closet, passing rows upon rows of shirts, shoes, dresses, skirts, jewelry...the list went on and on. I'd never even SEEN the majority of this stuff. But then we got far enough into the maze of clothes and Edward pulled me under a rack of very sparkly shirts. He then murmured quietly, "good luck finding us now, Alice."

~*~

It wasn't a long time later that Edward froze up. "Bella" he whispered, almost too low for my vampire ears to catch, "don't move." I glanced at his face- there was a look of utmost concentration, but I saw humor written in the curve of his lips. Moments later, I heard the latch of the closet doors open and close.

I sucked in a breath, knowing I would be able to hold it for a while. Listening intently, I was able to make out footsteps- heavy shoe clad ones, followed by quicker, lighter ones. If I had a pulse right now, it'd be racing with adrenaline. Dear god, don't let Alice find us! But as I listened closer, I noticed that the stride of the lighter footsteps was longer...Alice had a short quick stride, so this must be...Rosalie? What was Rosalie doing in Alice's closet? With Emmett?

Oh.

Guess we aren't the only ones hiding from Alice...and making use of a (supposedly) empty closet.

...

This may get interesting.

~*~

I am SOOO incredibly thankful that I live in a cottage in the woods.

I would DIE if I had to live with these two on a day to day basis. I knew they were very...physical people, but good grief! Don't they take a break?! Thanks to them, we had been stuck in here for almost an hour and the...noises showed no sign of stopping. I let out a sigh and leaned against Edward. I looked up- the sparkling items of clothing above us cast light on his -and my- skin, making me think back to the first day I had seen him in the meadow.

A small click broke me out of my thoughts.

I sniffed the air and recoiled against Edward.

Pixie alert.

A sing song voice floated out towards us. "Rosalie, Emmett, Bella, Edward, come out, come out, wherever you are!"

You could have heard dust bump together in that massive, twisting room. All was silent...and I was nothing short of terrified of the little vampire I was sure was heading towards us.

_**APOV**_

I couldn't contain the laughter that had been bubbling up for the past few minutes. To think- they tried to sneak around in MY closet. My closet! The idiots. Momma KNOWS her closet.

I also knew about the cameras hidden strategically all around the maze of clothes- my clothes _were_ very valuable, after all. It wasn't that difficult to check the screens...and see quite a few vampires escaping into the (supposed) solitude of my expansive closet.

I pulled in reluctant Jasper, who knew what was going on. "Honey," he said, using the southern drawl I loved him for. "Take it easy on 'em."

I giggled, shook my head, and whispered in his ear.

"If you find Edward and Bella in less than 3 minutes, you get a treat tonight."

He instantly snapped to attention, and was off faster than I'd seen him go in a long time. I laughed. SOME one was a little eager.

After looking around the twisting space, I set off on my quest to find Rosalie and Emmett. It wasn't that hard-

All I had to do was track the trail of shoes and outer garments. I wrinkled my nose in distaste, but still hoped that they had left SOME clothes on.

If they hadn't, they got to clean up this place.

Determined, I marched over to where I saw Emmett's feet sticking out from under a pile of clothes. I kicked it, with my little pointy toed shoe, and he yelped. I heard Rosalie groan, and I grinned, satisfied. I listened carefully, and heard jasper confronting Bella and Edward. I had to admit, they're hiding place in the eighties clothes was a good one- I never went over there anymore. But nonetheless, I clapped my hands and spun around. I ALWAYS win!

_**EMPOV**__**,**__** RPOV, EDPOV, BPOV**_  
Crap.


End file.
